Yesterday, birds came from dinosaurs*. Today, they're going back.
At a factory poultry farm in Nebraska, someone has been playing with nature. In the ongoing attempt to raise faster-growing, more flavorful birds that can be raised in ever-smaller cages, breeders accidentally activated ancient dormant genes, turning the mildest of farm animals into bloodthirsty killing machines with an oddly familiar taste. And if a narcoleptic USDA inspector and an overeducated tractor repairman can't stop them before they complete their breeding cycle, then the Midwest doesn't stand a chance.
Ladies and gentlemen, I bring you:
Dino-Chickens
*Yes, okay, not really. But work with me here.
When I first saw the title, I thought you had gone to Safeway to buy a Foster Farms chicken on sale, as I had. They were as much as six and a half pounds! If that's a "young chicken," as the label said, think how big they'd be if they were allowed to grow to adulthood!
ReplyDeleteDad
sounds almost as terrifying as Land Squids!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteKaren C
Coming Soon: Dino-Chicken vs Land Squid!
ReplyDelete(Tagline: Either way, we're fried.)