The Why-Files

Is clear plastic really that expensive?
Outreach to the partial-foot-amputee community?
Someone in the marketing department has a crippling fear of toes?
Proactive recruiting at the Home for Disabled Mannequins?
Final, definitive evidence that the fashion industry is run by aliens who do not fully understand the construction of the human body?

Frankly, I'm stumped.

Kickstarter of the Week*: Dogs in Cars

It's a photo book of dogs in cars. I don't totally get it, but I think I kind of love it.

*Or, rather, of however many weeks it takes before I do another one.

Ugly Clothes for Rich People X

Let's see what all the wealthy idiots will be wearing this season, shall we?

Thakoon coat, $1,990

"But Fairy Godmother," said Cinderella. "What if I get cold? It is the middle of fall, after all, as we can see by all these ripe pumpkins."
So her fairy godmother gathered up a horse blanket and a couple of shower mitts and waved her wand, and in a flash of light they were transformed into a lovely coat.
"Now remember," the Fairy Godmother said. "You must be home by midnight, before these things turn back into the pile of trash that they are and you end up looking ridiculous."

Nigel Cabourn pants, $865

Imagine, if you can, the process involved in buying these. A person, presumably sober, walking into the store, sees these pants, picks them up and decides to try them on, all without laughing so hard he has a seizure. Looking at himself in the mirror, he decides that yes, these are worth almost nine hundred dollars of his money. And then he pays for them and leaves, without once stopping to evaluate how his life got to this point.

Boggles the mind, doesn't it?

Moschino t-shirt, $295

 Nothing says kicky fun like contemplating suicide!

Emma Cook skirt, $335

 For some reason I am feeling a sudden impulse to tease my bangs. Someone hand me the Aquanet.

Ann Demeulmeester coat, $748

Paging Dr. Sparkles!

Why Did The Snake Cross The Path?

To escape the paparazzi.

Guess I can strike "wildlife photographer" off my alternate careers list.

Why Don't You Get Back To Me When You Figure It Out

Apparently, even the people who work at the cafeteria aren't that sure what goes into the food: