I don't know how to say this, but
I hate you.
Harsh but accurate.
I hate your endless personal phone calls
Your novelty ringtone
Your eternal coughing that
echoes across the empty office space.
I find it annoying everyone else
in your group was laid off.
But you weren't.
And more than anything I hate
the way that every conversation you have
is just you saying, "Right." "Of course." "Exactly." "You're right."
To the disembodied male voice that's talking to you.
That's why I had to write you this poem
in free verse.
The only thing I hate more than you.